Prison and dating may not gel together, but hey, prisoners need love too. However, this is not a typical situation where many would have love to find themselves. In many cases, others have already found the love of their lives, but their significant others were arrested through a series of unfortunate events.
If you are still committed to loving someone who’s currently incarcerated, then you’re on the right page. Read more about falling in love with a prison pen pal here: https://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/a27242148/falling-in-love-in-prison/. You may need some tips to boost your morale and see if this a good decision that you’ve made.
When You Found Your Prince Charming in Prison
Many girls may not have imagined or dreamt about finding the love of their lives incarcerated in prison. The prince charming is often portrayed as gentle, loving, courageous, brave, strong, and honorable. But sometimes, the prince is in jail, and he needs a princess who’s willing to wait for him to create their kingdom.
Know that not everyone who has committed a crime has become a bad person. Some have changed for the better, and they became men of honor. Many may not have transformed and may have preyed on women for their money and connections, but still, there are exceptions. So, how would you know if this particular guy is not using you for his own gain?
Loving Men that’s Incarcerated Have Heartaches
No matter what you do, you can’t spend time together, and both can’t interact with friends and families. Calls, visiting hours, and letters are the only way to date and communicate. The most important tip that you need to keep in mind is that if you’re planning to spend your life with a former inmate, please forget about him and move on to someone else.
Don’t waste both of your time. If you think that they don’t have feelings, then think again. Some who have taken the time to know their boyfriends have seen the heartache that had pushed them to commit a crime. You can check right here for more information on how you can meet these people in your life. But with this said, it’s important that you’re serious about what you’re about to do.
Tips to Keep in Mind When Dating
Define some boundaries before visiting and stick to them. The prison culture is entirely different from the outside world, and this is also the same with the people inside. The rules have changed, and there may be a strange curiosity that you will find that will get you deeper into the prison experience.
You need to avoid finding out more about life in prison and focus on the man. They don’t have much access to the women, and they are safer than when you meet with someone outside whom you know little about. Establish some boundaries during the first meeting but let them know that they can safely open up to you to give them hope while incarcerated. You just have to make sure that you lose their trust and give them false hopes, though, as this can backfire.
If you’re still unsure, what you need to do are the following:
1. Write lots of letters. If you did not receive any replies, just cut the communication.
2. There’s a rule that you should never try to send money to him or purchase sundry boxes. What you need is for him to see that you wouldn’t want to be taken advantage of. You may want to be generous with collect calls, though, as they are not given much time to talk to their loved ones. Wait at least half a year before you send gifts. If he lost his interest, then know that he may not even have taken the relationship seriously in the first place.
3. You should never take any children during the time that you’re visiting him unless you two are engaged. If you have children, it’s essential to let him know about this, especially if the relationship is progressing. If he’s the father, then you may want to ask the kids first if they are willing to meet with their dad or would instead prefer a phone call.
4. Plan surprise visits if possible. You’ll learn more about his temperaments when you decide to plan a surprise visit or two to him. He’s going to be happy, or you may find that he’s hardly going to talk to you during this time. It’s essential to establish communication first, though. Write letters for several months, and afterward, this may be the right time to get to know him better.
5. It’s best if there are no kisses and hugs during the first six months. You may be waiting for a long time, and you’ll have limited time during the meeting. However, the first kisses can cloud your judgment, and you may not have time to know his true intentions. Besides, you’ll feel more committed if there’s touching and kissing involved.
6. Take the closest person that you have for a visit. This is helpful if you two are officially dating. Your best friend’s opinion is crucial because they don’t have any assumptions and cloudy judgment during this process. Another thing is that if everything goes well, you’ll always find yourself getting extra support in the process.
7. Spend time sharing your goals and dreams and find out if he has a plan for the future. Many incarcerated people have a lot of dreams, and they can find hope when they are finally free. When they have finished serving jail time, and they know that there’s someone out there waiting for them, then they will do their best to change their ways and prevent getting prison time again.
8. When he’s finally free, the best thing you can do is get involved with support groups. Take courses that will keep the relationship healthy, and hopefully, there are classes out there that will be interesting to both of you. Take the time to build a hobby to spend more time together and understand him on a deeper level. The right person will love hard and more in-depth, and they wouldn’t want to be parted from you ever again.