Taking Care of Aging and Stubborn Parents: 9 Apt Ways to Do It

Updated on July 27, 2021

Aging comes with a variety of complex health problems. As a result, seniors begin fearing the unknown, such as losing independence and severe medical conditions that don’t go away. Consequently, older people avoid seeking help and are more than often secretive about new health problems they experience.

Watching your parents make unhealthy and dangerous choices can be painful. And for grown-up adults, this sudden shift from care recipient to caregiver sounds like an impossible task to accomplish. Sailing through these troubled waters is never easy. You’ll need to keep a close watch on your emotions so that you can take care of your parents and manage their needs – both physical and emotional.   

Where there is disharmony between seniors and their adult children, family conflicts become a family norm. To help you avoid all these disputes and arguments you are having with your aging parents while trying your best to give them the care they deserve, we have compiled a list of ways to help provide your parents the comfort and support they need in their old age. 

  • Be Persistent 

Patience and persistence are the two most critical emotional traits of a person that helps them take conversations on a productive route. Don’t expect to resolve every issue and problem of your aging parents with only one sitting. On the other hand, it might be possible that you’ll have to bring your concerns to your parents more times than you can imagine – so be persistent. Bombarding your aging parents with too much information in a single sitting can redundantly trigger their anger and fears. This becomes even truer in the cases where your loved ones are suffering from cognitive impairment, which makes it more than difficult for them to take in too much information at once.  

  • Be Sensitive

Judgment and criticism can put anyone on the defensive, and when it comes to your aging parents, this can create a massive problem for you. Harshly telling your parents that they cannot take care of themselves will make things worse, not better for you. Instead, follow this simple rule and stick to “I” statements, like “I.” I am worried because you are losing weight, and I’m afraid you will not eat a nutritious diet. When your aging parents know that you are sensitive and caring towards them, they’ll have fewer reasons to protest and more reasons to agree to your concerns. 

  • Pick Your Battles More Wisely

At all costs, avoid pushing, nagging, and lecturing your aging parents. Asking them to accomplish a specific task in a limited time will not encourage them to get their backs up. On the contrary, it can make things even more difficult for you. And yelling, slamming doors, arguing, and so on can damage your relationship permanently. Instead, ask your elderly parents to be a part of every crucial decision-making process. Make sure they feel that you value their emotions and opinions with your words and actions. 

  • Work on Your Timing

You can never have a productive conversation if everyone sitting in the room is feeling stressed and exhausted. Therefore, always make sure that your parents are relaxed and rested when choosing to have a challenging conversation with them. And you too can follow this advice. If you initiate an exchange, make sure you are not dealing with any stress because your anxiety will only add more to your parent’s fears. 

  • Try Finding Solutions Rather Than Problems

Try focusing on your parent’s concerns rather than addressing their problems. Always make sure you do your research, and if you don’t have a valid answer to their problems, don’t make one out of thin air. The aim here is to cultivate trust and encourage the spirit of mutual support and understanding. 

  • Keep Calm

It could be possible that your parents are aware that they are facing a new challenge, so not discussing their future might be the right thing to do rather than admit to reality. However, that doesn’t mean you can’t state your concerns calmly and lovingly. A few words spoken with love and tenderness can reassure that they are not all alone and you are always there to help and support them during their difficult times. 

  • Seek Help

It may not always be possible for you to meet your older parents’ demands or needs. Sometimes you’ll need to take an extra helping hand to cater to the needs of your aging parents. With the help and assistance of a pain freedom coach, you’ll get more chances to deal with their discomfort and solve their problems efficiently. These experts can heal pain with their words in ways you can never think of. They have the knowledge and experience to deal with the issues seniors face and quickly focus on the actual problems bothering them. With the assistance of a pain freedom coach, you can make the life of your aging parents more enjoyable and productive. 

  • Spend More Time With Your Parents

You may not always have extra time on your hands, but once you start cultivating this habit and spending more time with your parents, you’ll see drastic positive changes in their behavior. But, this will only work if your relationship with them is not a reason for conflict. However, if that’s not the case, your parents are more likely to appreciate you spending your time with them. Consequently, your interactions with them will start becoming more harmonious. When your parents know you are giving them a priority, their relationship will begin to become more accessible and satisfying. 

  • Try Understanding the Motive Behind Their Behavior

When providing care to your loved ones, don’t just try to listen to their words but also try to understand what they might not be saying. For instance, they may be avoiding visiting the doctor because they are afraid of what the doctor might have to say about their condition. More than often, fear and anxiety is the main reason for their unapologetic behavior. 

To Sum it Up

Your aging parents may not show it, but they start getting weaker and more vulnerable as they move forward. And sometimes they can even ignore this fact and behave in a certain way that you don’t understand. However, dealing with this issue is possible. The tips mentioned above will assist you in cultivating a more healthy and happy relationship with your aging parents.


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