Baby Boomers—A Formula for Preparing for the Realities of Our Future

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As Baby Boomers and older generations, we are aging into a future in which we face the possibility, perhaps the probability, of disability and/or dementia. And we face the reality of the inevitability of our death.

Are we prepared for these realities? Are our loved ones prepared? Acknowledging and addressing the realities and preparing for them is difficult subject matter, but at the same time, it is crucial that we do so.

Along with these difficult realities, we have the opportunity to answer a profound question, “What do I want to do with the rest of my life?” Regardless of our hope horizon, the amount of time we have remaining, we can act to make the most of that time.

Hence, we should prepare for the difficult realities and for the optimistic opportunity. But how to proceed? Preparing for our future can follow this formula…

Preparation = Essential Conversations + Planning + Mindset + Practice

A key step is to begin and then continue to have the difficult yet essential conversations. As but a few examples…do we have financial and estate plans in place, and are our children aware of what those are? Do we know how we would address caretaking if we become disabled or find that we are living with dementia? Are we taking the necessary steps to prevent or postpone disability and dementia or to enhance our longevity, both the quantity and quality of our years? Do our loved ones and our medical team know what our end-of-life wishes are? Said another way—who should we be talking to about what and when?

One of the objectives of essential conversations is to collaborate with loved ones and others to develop specific plans on how we want to move forward in our lives. We tend to spend a lot of time in our lives planning (e.g., home projects, vacations, meals, work assignments) but relatively little time planning our lives.

For example, what steps are we taking to minimize the risk of disability? An even more specific example, what are we doing to prevent falls, a common cause of disability and even death as we age? Every second of every day, someone 65 or older suffers a fall; about three million need to go to the hospital as a result of their fall; and nearly 39,000 older adults die annually from fall-related injuries. What is our personal fall-prevention plan?

Other planning examples…what is our specific plan to age-proof our home and/or to decide when will be the right time to move to another living situation, even, perhaps, assisted living? What is our specific plan to keep our mind active to stave off the possibility of dementia? What specific activities will we start, stop, or continue to enhance the quality of our lives we have worked so hard to deserve?

Two other concepts related to planning…first, if we write down our plans, we are much more likely to actually do them. Second, we can expect our life circumstances to change, sometimes requiring a change in our plans—it behooves us, therefore, to periodically review and renew our plans. As some say, a plan is only something from which to deviate…but have a plan.

Mindset is another key component of preparing for the realities of our future. It is our set of beliefs that shape how we interact with the world around us, and it influences how we respond to life’s challenges. If faced with adversity, does our mindset drive us to “throw in the towel,” or does it enable us to persevere, learn, and move on? Are we resilient?

Many believe that our mindset, our attitude, is hardwired into our personalities, but it has been demonstrated time and again that we have the ability to improve our mindset. We can practice mindfulness. We can practice gratitude. Perhaps we can just decide to have a more positive attitude.

Speaking of practice, we have the opportunity to practice our future realities. Here’s but one example. In most partner households, one of the partners is primarily responsible for daily living tasks. One partner may tend to finances and laundry, while the other may handle grocery shopping and food preparation. What if one of the partners becomes disabled, is diagnosed with dementia, or dies? Will the other be able to pick up that partner’s responsibilities. The opportunity is to use time together when all is well to teach the other partner how to manage the tasks and then have that partner practice them. When the real need comes, that partner will at least have had some experience to take on the responsibility.

As difficult as it is to contemplate the realities as we age into our future, it will be even more difficult to live in that future if we haven’t prepared for it.